Overwhelmed Parents?


If the constant raging around the birth control debate proves anything, it should be that couples should have every say over when they do and do not have children. So with that out of the way, if you can afford birth control, and you know that you don’t want to have a second kid so close to the first, but you choose no contraception anything other than sporadic condom use… then you lose the right to complain when you have two children close in age. Why?

Because you wanted it that way.

And that’s okay. If you’re in a stable marriage and prepared for all the kids that come your way, that’s great. But you can’t scoff at the parents who complain about the struggles of having one kid, and play the “you should try having two” card. You wanted two kids close in age, otherwise you would have taken steps to make sure that you didn’t.

My oldest two are just over a  year apart, and while I bitched and moaned to my husband every chance I got that we fucked up, whenever strangers asked me if it was hard, I said, sure, but we knew it would be. It took forever to get pregnant with my first one, which is why I was ready to start right away for number two. I knew there was a chance it would happen immediately, and I was willing to take that risk. Afterwards, having learned my lesson, I waited almost three years between each of the next three. I jumped on the IUD bandwagon like a rat from a sinking ship.

So stop acting like you’re a victim of circumstance. You made this choice.

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About Jessénia

Jessénia Natalia Larcombe-Urban is a graduate of Jacqueline Kennedy Onassis High School and NYU, where she is a member of Alpha Phi Zeta. The owner and president of Síren Call Records, Sénia has five children and one step son with her late husband. View all posts by Jessénia

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