Keep Your Traditions. I’ll Keep Mine.

As a staunch member of the Straights for Gays, sometimes I still have to step back and really let it sink in that people truly, honestly, are against it. And even further, the reasoning behind it. I watched an argument between two people that went something along the lines of a hater saying that because gay people can’t reproduce – which is apparently the number one point of marriage, just proving that these people are stuck in centuries past, because I’m pretty sure I married for love. Children were just a happy byproduct – then the union is unnatural. Supporter says, clearly you haven’t heard of sperm and egg donors, surrogates, adoption. Hater says that pregnancy through donors and implantation is not natural, and therefore, again, same-sex marriages are not natural. Supporter says, what about straight couples who use donors, surrogates, and IVF? Hater had no answer. And also, what about adoption? Are the haters going to say that that’s unnatural too? Idiots.

And of course, this all brings to question something that no one can possibly overlook: If not being able to bear children is what makes the marriage unnatural and wrong, then shouldn’t we be forbidding elder couples from marrying? What about anyone who is sterile? What’s that? No? It would be wrong and unconstitutional? Well then.

In the midst of thinking  about people’s asinine thoughts on gay marriage, I want to toss this out there:

And then, because nothing sums it up better than the rant used by my friend when she shared this:
“After reading this several times and laughing the entire way through, I can’t decide what’s worse. Of course my brain seized over the grammar (what adult doesn’t know how to spell ‘lying?’ Also, ‘ect.’ Seriously?) and the inconsistent capitalization of God.
But then I took a look at the content, and realized that… if she believes it’s a sin in God’s eyes, then she most likely believes or heard of the Sodom and Gomorrah story, which would have taken place, y’know, some time prior to the 70s, give or take a few years.
Also, to bogart Wanda Sykes, if being gay is a choice, then it means being straight is a choice. Not to mention, I can’t think of a single person who would choose to be hated by so many people for no reason at all. I hate it when people go there. If they want to hide behind religion, fine, do what you want, but to say it’s a choice, ugh, idiots.”

The constant panic attacks at the worries that same-sex marriage will magically undermine the “traditional” marriage blow my mind. Every single person who thinks that way needs to go to a state where it’s already legal (come on and visit New York, I can put you up in our Manhattan apartment), and ask every straight couple how they feel about their marriage now that gay couples are married too. I guarantee none of them feel as if their marriage is somehow in peril. If you feel that yours might be, then the problem lies within your marriage, not someone else’s.

And let’s talk about traditional marriages. Since everyone wants to pick and choose from the Bible to oppose same-sex marriage, maybe they need to be reminded of some other points:

  • Marriages are to be arranged and must be in the same faith.
  • A wife should be subordinate (Ephisians 5:22)
  • A woman must prover her virginity, lest she be stoned (Deuteronomy 22:20-21)
  • If a man dies without having sired a son, his widow must marry his brother and reproduce with him until they have a son (Mark 12:18-27)
  • Concubines and polygamy were norms.

Yep. Things sound all well and dandy with those traditional family values. You can go ahead and keep those, thank you. I’m not very interested.

Although, it’s too bad Richard and I had #3 and #4, I would have finally had that excuse I needed to bang his brother. Darn.


About Jessénia

Jessénia Natalia Larcombe-Urban is a graduate of Jacqueline Kennedy Onassis High School and NYU, where she is a member of Alpha Phi Zeta. The owner and president of Síren Call Records, Sénia has five children and one step son with her late husband. View all posts by Jessénia

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