25 things every woman needs to know.

Well said.

hannah brencher.

1) Life is a steep, uphill battle but it’s fierce & it’s beautiful & you’ll be sad to see it go if you live it right.

2) New people won’t stop coming into your life and opportunities won’t stop knocking on the door but you need to have the space for them. In all you currently have– be them relationships or obligations– step back and ask yourself “why.” If you can find the answer, hold tighter. If the answer escapes you, it’s time to let something go.

3) You should resolve to be awesome for the rest of your life. Right now. Do it.

4) Leggings, no matter how much we wish, will never one day magically transform into pants. Wearing them with tops that don’t cover your bum is not cute. Please, please, please stock up on pants.

5) Goals are not a January 1st kind of thing. Set…

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Talking Dead with Ambrosia: Isolation

Sorry we missed the first two weeks! There was some confusion between a couple of us on who was going to take the job. But I’m back! First, the disclaimer:

Warning: Spoiler Alerts
 If you are familiar with the Talking Dead, you know it talks about the episode that just aired, and since I’m posting here as if I’m in that conversation, clearly I will be talking about the episode.

This week there was so much going on, so much I want to talk about, that I honestly don’t know if I can stick to the previously established format of responding as if I was sitting on the couch with the guests. I can’t wait to get into what they had to say, but I just need to get some stuff off my chest first.

Holy flying fuck, Carol. And Beth. Prediction number one – Beth is going to be the only one who survives the apocalypse. Carol, not Carl, is soon to be the governor 2.0. Who saw that shit coming? I had maybe one third of an ounce of fleeting suspicion, just based on the whole teaching the kids about knives, trying to toughen the girls up, that whole thing. but it passed quickly.  I honestly might – might – have suspected Caleb (Doctor S), say Karen and David died during the night and he quickly killed them and got it taken care of, and just never had a chance to tell anyone.

Now, I know that Carol has changed a lot. She’s definitely lost that grieving person she was in Season 2, and though we saw her start to take on a little more in season 3, this season has seen her in that major leadership position, on the council, coordinating things (like when she pointed out the fence issues to Daryl at the beginning of the premiere). It’s almost as if she just decided screw it, I’m not gonna sit back and watch the world go to shit around me, I’m taking control of my life.  I’m a little scared of her, to be honest.

I will say this though, Marilyn Manson brought up an interesting romance point, that Michonne and Daryl will get together, and the timing is perfect. I can’t remember if I ever mentioned it here or if it was just something I discussed with someone else (a quick skim tells me that I didn’t do it here), even though I personally ship Rick and Michonne, I think that she and Carol would be the two front-runners for being with Daryl. Here’s why:

Carol & Daryl: They’ve definitely bonded, starting in Season 2 when Daryl’s undeserved guilt over leaving Merle behind (undeserved because he had nothing to do with it) is what led him to constantly search for Sofia when everyone else just kind of gave up. Rick’s concern was for Carl – which makes sense – which likely left Carol with a feeling of, ‘but what about my child?’ and Daryl was the only one who saw that, who saw her. When you combine that to the abusive marriage she was in, and then we find out that Daryl was abused as a child, which is probably why he did go out of his way to continually search for Sofia. He knew, more than anyone, how important it was for Carol to have something to hold onto, something to live for. Daryl had Merle, he knew Carol needed Sofia. Once Carol began doting on him, she became a bit of a replacement for Merle. Daryl needed someone looking out for him, and might not have realized it until she started to do so. On the flip side of that, she needed to take care of someone, so he he became a replacement for Sofia. She’s softened him up a bit, given him connection to someone, and he’s hardened her up a little. She’s the yin to his yang. They do have some really cute flirty banter, and they did back in 3 as well, so it does have a natural feel.

Michonne & Daryl: It seems only fitting that someone like Daryl have someone with as much badassery as Michonne by his side (although I guess now you could argue that Carol has it). Additionally, I did mention at the end of last season that there was a moment of mutual respect between Merle and Michonne, which is something that Daryl and Michonne can further bond over, more than the small bond they seem to have now over their hatred of the Governor. On two occasions he’s expressed some sincere joy at seeing her. For instance, in the premiere when she first arrived. I can’t remember exactly what he said, basically that she was looking no worse for wear, and even though basically he was just saying, hey, you’re not hurt, you look healthy, it was the simple fact that he said it. He’s stating the obvious, but it could be taken as “Heyyy, look at you.” And now tonight, he explicitly stated, “I’m glad you’re here.” Not only that, but he called her back as she was starting to walk away to get oil for the car, just to tell her he was glad she was there. Additionally, she made a comment, asking if they were going on a run alone together, ‘just like in the old days,’ and they kind of smirked at each other. What happened in the six months between Season 3 and Season 4? And why did he seem like a lost little boy when he said she was just running away? Like a boy who is really into a girl and he can’t quite tell her…. Hmmm? Also, the fact that they were both pretty much loners who had to learn to connect to people. She clearly had some shitty stuff happen to her too (after that mini-meltdown when she was holding Judith – I’m thinking she had a kid that turned, and she had to kill him/her, or maybe she even killed him/her so as not to be crying zombie bait?) that we’ve never gotten into, and they could just lean on each other. Plus they both have silent but deadly ninja type skills.

Like I said, I still ship Michonne and Rick, and they could just as easily fill specific voids for each other, especially if I’m right with the fact that she had a child. But seriously, Daryl and Michonne… Manson may have been on to something. And then when you look at how Carol is now, has she maybe gonna a little bit too far too the badass side to be an appropriate match for Daryl?

Side note about the car… Even though Zack only had a small role, think about him for a minute. Do you really think he would have had a the factory stereo in that Charger?

Additional side note: Daryl alone in a car with three black people. How he’s changed…

So, something that they brought up on Talking Dead, leadership. Rick is clearly moving back into a position of leadership. I don’t think he was ever truly able to give up the position, because you see that the councilmembers still consult with him anyway. Honestly, I’m really looking forward to what’s gonna happen with the council now that Rick knows Carol is the one who killed Karen and Dave.

Seriously though. Carol. I guess I’m not that stunned, really having time to think about it, but… wow. When she gets all upset after talking to Tyrese – Hardwick raised this point – is she angry with herself for not actually stopping the virus in time? Is she angry because Tyrese just asked her to watch over Sasha and now she’s like, ‘Shit, now I gotta kill Sasha too?’ especially after she already killed someone close to Tyrese? Is she thinking about how she has to kill Lizzie? Is she reliving Sofia turning, over and over again? I really can’t wait. Remember last season when Rick started shutting people out (Tyrese and Sasha being great examples) to protect his group from outside threats? Well, will he see Carol as a threat from here forward? As mentioned on Talking Dead, that final scene was a moment where he no longer recognizes her. How will this change? And then there’s Carl. He tattled that Carol was teaching the kids about using knives but then told Rick he shouldn’t stop her. The knife lessons, by the way, are so obviously her attempt to prepare the kids for the world in which they’re living, something she didn’t do for Sofia, and maybe she blames herself for Sofia’s fate. Carl got a little bloodthirsty last season, and even though I think he was a brat about it, he may have had a point. I think I can see Rick being all like, Carol must go! and Carl stepping in to point out that she was trying to do the right thing. Herschel’s been pretty logical about everything, he’s definitely swayed way more towards science from the man of faith he used to be, so I could definitely see him being on Carol’s side, which may cause a rift between Herschel and Maggie, with Glen being sick.

And that leads me to Beth. Beth has quickly adjusted (maladjusted?) to the fact that attachments shouldn’t run so deep, and I see her believing in the side that says ‘they’re about to die, just kill them.’ It’s a bit eerie, how detached she’s gotten. Her previous coping mechanism had been to try to kill herself, so has she just retreated for far into herself that this shell is completely fake? Is she going to snap like Tyrese, or hell, like Carol at some point and just start killing everything?

On thing is for sure: Things are going to get ugly. Will we see some Lord of the Flies, and see them split into two separate factions?

Let Your Own Light Shine

Don’t be afraid to stand out.

Adventures in Online Dating: The Intro Message Hook

Yet another item that infuriates me when it comes to online dating is when assholes come up with utter bullshit in order to draw you in. Just state upfront what your goal is. I guarantee that you’ll find someone who is seeking the same. If you’re looking to settle down into a relationship, don’t bark up the tree of someone who just wants some carefree, lusty fun; and vice versa.

That being said, why go through the rigamarole of acting like you’re seriously trying to court someone if you’re just trying to get them in bed? This is a little something I’ve come to call the Intro Message Hook.

You get that message. The person sounds awesome. Someone you think you’ll click with. Their profile is sparse, but what is there is good. You find them attractive. It’s all good. They even acknowledge right up front your number one deal-breaker, and explain why it shouldn’t be one. You think to yourself, this is awesome!

Spoiler Alert: They’ve given you all the lies.

 “You seem like someone with a great head on her shoulders and I think we’d be really good together. I know I’m a little young but don’t let that fool you. I’m actually looking for something serious and I was raised to know how to treat a woman.”

Sounds great, right? He was. Until two hours later, when I responded to that message with a spontaneous invite to chill that night. His name is Joe, and anytime I say ‘Hey Joe’ to someone, I think of Empire Records, in that tone of voice Lucas uses when he says, “Heeeyy…Joe.” You know which one I mean.  So I asked if he’d ever seen it. He hadn’t, so I made a note to myself to suggest that we watch it. He was the one who first asked if I was free to hang out that night. I was.

“Would you like to have some fun together like make out and cuddle and little foreplay and then whatever happens, if not I understand.”


Guess what? He did not understand.
In fact, he became immediately douchey.

My first reaction

My first reaction

He amended his message to read ‘Would you like to hang out and just see how things go?’ Really? Really? Like I can’t tell you’re basically asking the same thing with different words?  I wasn’t in the mood to get into it, so I just told him I had my niece with me and wasn’t available right away, that it would depend when my sister came to pick her up. He asked ‘why can’t you drop her off home?’ Obviously because I’m babysitting you jackass. Even if it was a lie.

He then peppered me every half hour with an update request. Did she call, are you free now, I wanna go on a romantic walk with you. Fuck that, dude. The door in the face technique does not work when it comes to dating, you creepy bastard. Not even dating, considering that you are still a complete stranger to me. The fact that I know your first name does not put us on close ground. I just left it simple, telling him I wasn’t going to be available that night.

But then came the incessant texts the next day. And the day after that. Finally I was just like, look, I’m busy, not to mention, I’m still a little turned off by that text the other night . He gave me his whole ‘I’m just being honest’ thing again, so I was straightforward and said okay fine, then that means your initial message to me was not honest. Also, I’m not interested; I already have a friend for fun.

It seemed to be a repetitive theme through everything he said, that he was just being honest. Other guys will say the same, “I’m just being honest.” Well, if you’re so into honesty, then be upfront when you first contact me. Tell me that you’re looking for a quick hookup over the weekend, so that I don’t bother to think you might be interesting. I’m not worried about you wasting your time, but don’t waste mine.

Blurring the Lines of Feminism: A Criticism of the Criticism of “Blurred Lines”

I’m not really a pop fan, and my opinion of Robin Thicke is really nonexistent. I remember liking that first song that made him big… or second or third, I don’t remember, exactly. And I don’t care enough to look it up either. Anyway, I actually like Blurred Lines. That shit is catchy. And here’s the thing, the song is more about cheating than anything else, and frankly. WOMEN DO EXIST WHO enjoy the attention of the dude across the room, who actually LIKE to be pursued. Even the most liberated, feminist woman can still get freaky and enjoy letting a man take the lead. Jesus Christ. There’s no point in the song that indicates the female subject is resisting or rejecting the advances.
Can’t we just have a fun summer party song? Did anyone ever analyze Lil Jon’s Get Low?


Dear capital-F Feminists, Please Stop the Slut-Shaming. Love, a lower-case-f feminist. 

The first time I heard the funky beats of Robin Thicke’s “Blurred Lines” emanating from my radio, I did what any normal, able-bodied human being would do…I boogied my ass off. But just days after the song’s meteoric rise to the top of the charts, scathing criticisms began to arise, citing sexual harassment, slut-shaming, and victim-blaming among many of the artists’ apparently blatant offenses. Because I could never QUITE make out the words behind Thicke’s panting falsetto, I decided to do my own research into the lyrics and see what was really causing the problem. What I found was shocking. I began reading the words fully expecting to arrive at the bottom not only incensed at their content, but also ashamed that I had ever bopped my head and shaken my buns to the beats.

What shocked…

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Obamacare Eggs and Ham

I wish I could make a decent joke about the Affordable Healthcare Act and women and reproduction ans stuff (thus tying in the Obamacare Eggs) but I can’t seem to make the link work.

I also fully admit to not know all the ins and out of AHA, which is why I’ve refrained from really discussing it, but no only are the premiums are coming in below the predictions of the Congressional Budget Office, but individuals will have an average of 53 qualified health plan choices. That’s pretty fantastic.

Then I saw this today, which just made me giggle.


I’m Back, You Missed Me.

Welp, here we are…

I now have 3 wonderful kids, they are my every day. I just bought my first house, my hubby is due to start school in a matter of months for a career he’s decided he loves… things are starting to look up for the moment:) I need to figure out what else to put here, will report back when my thoughts aren’t primarily with the migraine.

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